Tintumonte Budhi

Vakkyathil Prayogikkuka
“Kriyathmagam”
Tintumon: Teacher classil Kriyathmagam enna vakkinte artham chodhichappol aarum onnum mindiyilla… !!!
Tintumonoda Kali…

Tintumon and bus conductor

Bus Cunductor: Why are you standing near the door, is your father a watchman?
Tintu Mon: Why are you always asking for “Chillara”, Is your father a Beggar ??

Tintumonte Kalyanam

Tintumon: Njan ninte veetil poyirunnu,nammude kalyanam nadakkumennu thonnunnilla …
Tintumol :Endha, Achane kando ?
Tintumon: illa, ninte aniyathiye kandu.

Chemistry Class

Teacher : What is “Al2 O3 ?
Ramu : Alumina.
Teacher: Tintu, What is ‘Fe2 O3 ?
Tintumon : “Filomina”

Auto

Autoyil ninnirangiya tintumon:ethrayayi
Driver:100 roopa
tintu mon 50 roopa koduthu,appol choodaya driver:ivide vare sughich irunnallo ennit 50 roopayo
Tintu:thaanum ivide vare sughich irunnathalle,thante paisa enthina njan tharunnath

Good News

Tintumon : Achaa,Oru santhosha vaartha undu!
Achan : Entha ?
Tintumon : Achan Paranjille njan ee thavanthe exams enkilum pass aayaal enikku 1000 Rs tharaamennu !!!!
Achan : Uvvu !!!
Tintumon : Achante 1000 rs poyitilla….happy aayeelle…?

Revenge

Achan: eda tintuve…..nhan ninne vazhaku parayumbol ninaku feel aaville..appol nee ninte vishamom mattan enthu cheyum ?
Tintumon: njan veetile toilet nallapole vrithi aakum
Achan: athu kond ninte vishmom engane marana??
Tintumon: Nhan Toilet vrithi aakunath Achante toothbrush kond aanu!!!

Rajesh

Tintumon: a rajesh enne thalli,ini thaliyal njan shemichu enu varilla
Achan: nee mashodu paranjille?
Tintu: Hmmm…………avan thanneyanu ee rajesh!

Medical shop

Tintumon in medical shop
Tintumon:- chetta! chumakulla oru marunnu tha.
Shopkeeper:- tonikkano?
Tintumon:- ‘Tony’kalla ente ammakkaa…

Indicator

caril pokunna achan tintumonod:”indicator kathunnundo?onnu nokku”
tintumon:”undu…illa…undu…
illa…undu…illa…undu…illa…
undu…illa…”

Traffic sign board

Teacher : entha classil ethan vaikiyathu?
Tintumon: Traffic sign board kaaranam.
Teacher : Enthu sign board?
Tintumon : road side il ezuthi vachathu “School Ahead, Go Slow.”

PTA meeting

Tintumon: Dad, there is a small PTA meeting at school tomorrow…..
Dad: Wat do u mean by a small PTA meeting ?
Tintumon: its… just u, me & the Principal !

Red Beautiful

Teacher: nigalude achande name englishil parayamo?
Tintumon: RED BEUTIFUL UNDERWEAR
Teacher: Appol,Entha Achande Sharikula name
Tintumon: SUDERLAL SHETTI

Puli

Tintumon went to forest with his friend ,
pettenne oru puli munnil chaaady.!!
friend puliyude kannil mannu variyittu.
Friend: oodikko??
Tintumon: njan ethina odunne nee alle mannu vaary ittathu..!!!

Tintumon in classroom

Classil urangunna tintumonod
Teacher: uushmav alakkunna upakaranam etha?
Tintumon: Chatukam
Teacher: nhan entha chodichath?
Tintumon: uppumav ilakkunna upakaranamalle teacher….

Cigarette

Achante munpil ninnu cigaratte valikunna tintumonodu achan.
“Enthada ithu ? Achante munpil ninnano cigarette valikunnathu ? ”
Tintumonte cool marupadi – “Achanalle … petrol pump onnum allallo ! “

Chandranil vellamundu

Vartha..” Chandranil vellamundu-ISRO”
TINTUMON: pedikkenda, athu pandu NEIL ARMSTRONG kulichappo oorivacha mundaayirikum…
edukkan marannu kanum!!!

Tintumon’s Diary

14-11-2009: Nhan avalod oru poo chodichu.
Aval oru poochedi thannu.
15-11-2009: Avalod oru page chodichu.
Aval oru book thannu.
16-11-2009: Avalod oru umma chodichu.
Umma mathramalla…….
uppayum angalamarum koodi nallonam thannu……

Motta

Teacher: Namukku motta tharunna ethenkilum 4 jeevikalude peru parayu?
Tintumon jumped and said:
“Physics miss
English miss
Maths miss
Social miss!!”

Mandan

Teacher: “Eee classil mandanmar undenkil ezhunnettu nilku”
Aarum ezhunnettilla. 10 second kazhinjappol Tintumon ezhunnettu.
Teacher: “Oho… Ne mandanano ?”
Tintumon: “Teacher ottakku nilkunnathu kandappol sankadam thonni”

Achante upadesham

Achan: Daivam thamburan Molinnu vilichal nammalellavarum ponam tintumone….
Tintumon: Daivam thamburan molinnu vilichal moli mathram poya pore acho…??

Sleep with dad

Tintu: Im sleep with dad last night
Teacher corrects him: no..no..I slept with dad last night
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tintu: appo njan urangikazhinjayirikkum teacher vannath alle..?

Exam

Achan: Exam inu nee thottal ini enney achaa ennu vilikkendaaa….
Kurach divasam kazhinju…..
Achan: Enthayeda result???
Tintu mon:-Aliyaaa sorry daaa…..5 subject il potty machu!!

Sign Board

Tintumon was asked to write a sign board for the traffic near the school.
He wrote
“Drive carefully! Don’t kill the students, wait for the teachers”

Tintumonoda kali

To be is to do(Socrates)
To do is to be(Plato)
To be or not to be(Shakespeare)
Aaha angane vittal pattuo..Scoo be do be dooo(Tintu mon, LKG)……..

Dosa

Teacher: Name the liquid which changes to solid when heated
Tintumon: Dosa

Stupid

Tintumon went to his Dad’s Friend’s home late night.
Uncle offered him to Sleep in Baby’s room.
Tintumon refused because the Baby might Cry at Night and went to sleep in the drawing hall.
Next morning he saw a Beautiful young Girl at the breakfast table,
Tintumon : Who are you?
The girl replied,”I am Baby and You??”
Tintumon : I am a Stupid!!! :p

Tintumon as god

Tintumon: appurathe veettukar enne daivamayitta kanunne.
Amma: athu ninakkengane manassilayi?
Tintumon: Njan avarude veetilekk chennappol avaru parayukaya……
“DAIVAME, NEE PINNEYUM VANNO…!!!”

Theater

Chicken Biriyani kazhichittu cinema kaanaan poya Tintumon veetil madangi vannu.
Tintumon : “Ini orikalum cinema kanan chicken thinnittu kerilla”
Didumol : “Enthu patti ?”
Tintumon : “Vayattilulla kozhi vare koovi …”

Goa

Teacher:Tintumon,Where is your native place?
TintuMon: checkoslovakia.
Teacher:Tell me the spelling…
(kure neram alochichathinu sesham tintumon)
Tintumon:Patticheeee…….!!!!!!
my native place is GOA..

Petrol

Friend: Entha ithra vegathil angottum ingottum odunnath?
Tintumon: Brandiyanennu karuthi nhan petrol eduthukudichu. Athu oditheerkkukayanu!

Mother!

Father to Tintumon: Why can you not think every woman as your mother?
Tintumon: I can, but if i did so, what will people think of you?

Techy Tintumon

Teacher: Write a C program to prevent TITANIC from sinking..
Tintumon:Declare the variable TITANIC as float…!

Water

Teacher:What is the formula of water?
Tintumon:
H2MgClNaClHNO3CaCO3Ca(OH)2SnTnHg NiHCl(COOH)O
Teacher:What is this?
Tintumon: This is Corporation Water!

Sangathi

Achan:Ethenthaadaa nee 5 kilo ulli vangikkondu vannathu?
Tintumon:Njaan naale pattu paadaan pokuvallai?
Achan:Athinenthinaada ulli?
Tintumon:Achan kettittillai Star Singeril sangathi ulleennu varanam eenu paranjathu..

Group photo

Classinte Group photo eduthathinu sesham athu vangan kuttikale motivate cheyyunna teacher
Teacher: Ningal ellavarum valuthayikkazhinjal ningal ee photo nokki santhoshikkum. Appol mathrame ningalkithinte vila ariyoo..
Oral parayum.. ithu ramu.. ivan innu doctor aanu.. ithu kuttan… ivan ippol americayilanu…
Pinnilathe benchil ninnu Tintumon: Ithu teacher.. Iyal thattippoyi.

SSLC

SSLC 10 vattam ezhuthi thotta Tintumon thante PEN, examination board nu ayachu koduthu.. Oppam oru kurippum:
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“Aayudham vechu keezhadangunnu!” :D

New Boyfriend

Tintumon : My girl friend broke up with me and sent me pics of her with her new boy friend.
Appukuttan : Really bad.. what did u do??
Tintumon : I sent that pics to her dad :)

Similarity

Teacher: What is common between Gandhi, Budha, Krishna and Jesus…?
Tintumon: They were all born on public holidays

Sandwiches

One day tintumon went into a pub with his girlfriend Tintumol and after ordering two
drinks took some sandwiches out of their pockets and started to eat them.
“You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here,” complained the pub-owner.
So they exchanged their sandwiches…!!

Professor

A professor to tintumon: “what is attention deficit hyperactive disorder?”
tintumon: “JIMBALAKDI BAMBA”
professor: “i dont understand anything”
tintumon: “same 2 you”

Strong Love

Tintumon to girlfriend:- “Theegolangal panju vannalum, Kodumkattu veeshi adichalum njan ninne swantham aakkum…..
Girlfriend:- naale varumo chetta?
Tintumon:- Nokkatte mazha illengil varam…

Tintu’s Temple Visit

Tintumon: The youth nowaday is getting Worse!!
Friend: Y do u say that?
Tintu: I was in Temple, When a Guy next to me lit a Cigarette from the Aarathi. I was Shocked and almost dropped my Beer Bottle!!

Tintu’s beach visit..

A man jumped into sea and never came out….
Nxt day, 2 men jumped into sea and never came out…
Tintumon after watching this concluded that:
MAN IS SOLUBLE IN WATER..!!

Pranayam

“Nashtappedam pakshe pranayikkathirikkaruth”-kamala surayya
“Pranayikkam pakshe thalayil aavaruth”-TINTU MON

Vazhipad

Tintumon ambalattil vazhipad counter Q vil..
Munnile uncle : shambhu, thiruvatira, paalppaayasam.
Tintumon: Hans, break dance, chickenbiriyani…!

Chemistry genius

Tintumon : Eureka , I have found out the chemical TOILET
Calcium Cupric Sulphide…
To be precise , CaCuS ….

Frank Tintu

Teacher: Now tintumon, Tell me frankly. Do you say prayers before eating?
Tintumon: No sir, My mom is a good cook!!

Dr.Tintumon

“MBBS” passaya Tintumon adhyamaayi operation cheyyan thudangumbol daivathod prarthichu:
“Joly kittiyathinte 1st gift itha njan angot ayakkunnu.
sweekarikkane.”

Tintumon in Bus

Busil vadi kuthi nilkunna oru vayassan seatil irukkunna tintumonod “mon enne onnu sahayikkanam”
tintu: ”aa vadiyingu thannekoo,njan pidicholam”

With policeman

Tintu monum ,3 friendsum koodi cyclil Schoolil powukayaaayirunnu…
Oru Police’kaaran Kaikaatti….
Tintu : “phah….pullee.. Ippol Thanne 3 Per Aayi…

Muthassi

Tintu: muthashi marichu leave venam
Teachar: ninte muthashi yalle 1 masam munp marichath
Tintu: muthachan veendum ketti !!

Chenda

Tintumon:”Acha, enikkoru chenda vaangi tharumo?”
Achan:”Venda, nee mattullavare upadravikkum.”
Tintumon:”Illa acha,njan ellaavarum urangikkazhinje chenda edukku..”

Tintumon and His father

Tintumon thante puthiya toy bus’umayi :
“drrrr…pee pee pom..
Stop!
Ella thendikalum irangiko.
Eni kayaraanulla kazhuverikal kayaru.
Puvam rite..drrr..
Kayari nilkada pulle.
drrr..”
Ithu shradicha tintumonte achan sahikettapol bus edthu maati.
5 mintolam tintumon karanjapol achan bus thirichu kodthu..
Tintumon:
“drrr pee pee pom pom..drrr.. Stop..!
Vegam irangada pattikale,
allengil thanne oru naayintemon karanam 5 minute late aayi..!!
Puvam rite. tin tin……!!

Census

Panchayathil ninnum kanakku edukkan vanna udhyogasthan Tintumonte veetil ethi.
Udhyogasthan: Mone ee veetil Kakoos undo?
Tintu: Undallo..
Udhyogasthan: Sheri, Kinar undo ?
Tintu : Manassilayi!!..uncle vegam chennirunnolu..avide pipe-um bucketum undu.

Proposal

Innocent Proposal from tintumon(UKG-B) to Minimol(2-A)
Tintumon: i luv u…
Minimol: chi..poda,i’m elder than u
Tintumon: i’m madly luving u…
Minimol: poda…
Tintumon: chechi chechi pls…

Correction in Sentence

Tintumon: Can I go to the toilet?
English Teacher: Tintumon, MAY I go to the toilet?
Tintumon: But I asked first!

Progress report

Tintumonte Achan: Ninte progress report evideyada ?
Tintumon: Athu njan Ramuvinu koduthu.
Achan: Athenthinada ?
Tintumon: Avanu avante achane pedippickana…

Dineshan

Teacher :What is the name of Gandhiji’s son?
Tintumon: Dineshan
Teacher :Why?????
Tintumon : Mahatma Gandhi is the father of di-neshan

Appopan

Tintumon: Apoppan endha urangukayano?
Amma: Alla mone apoppan marichu. Nammal kozhiye okke kollumbol athu chaville?.. athu pole..
Tintumon: Appam Eppazha kari vekkunne!!

Mark

Mash: adutha pareekshakku nee 75% mark vanganam.
Tintumon: njan 100% mark vangum.
Mash: thamaasha parayallee…
Tintumon: Nayinte mone, aara aadhyam thamaasha paranjathu?

Railway

Train nirthiyapol yathrakaran tintuvinod: ithetha station…??
Tintumon windowilude purathek thalayitt nokiyitt: Railway station aanenn thonunnu…!

GIRL FRIEND

TINTU MON:eda enik avale marakkan pattunnilla
FRIEND:athrayku ishtamanenkil ninte veetil para
TINTU MON: Parayaam……..
U.K.G. result varatte

Geography

Teacher: “Tintumone.. ithavanayum ninakku geography-kku motta poojyam aanu. Ne entha geography padickathe ?”
Tintumon: “Achan parayarundu. Lokam anudhinam marikondirikkukayanennu. Lokam onnu settle aayikkotte. Ennittu padickam !”

thermodynamic law of romance

Tintumons thermodynamic law of romance:
“Luv can neither be created nor be destroyed. It can only be changed from one girlfriend to another with considerable loss of money”

fibre content

Tuttumol: Arinjo? oru nalla diet-lu dharalam fibre undakanam.
Tintumon: Athinentha thega thinnal pore .
Tuttumol: Thegayil high fibre content aano?
Tintumon: Pothikathe kazhichal mathi.

Achanum thengum

Thengil ninu veena achanumayi hospitalil ethiya tintumonodu
Dr: oru 5 min. mumpu ethichirunengil rekshapeduthamayirunu.
Tintumon: thengenu onnu veenu kittende doctor.

Girlfriend

Duttumon: “My girlfriend is an angel”
Tintumon: “You are lucky aliya. Ente girlfriend ippozhum jeevanode undu”

Exam barcode

Tintumon examil onnum kittathayappol peparil
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Ithu pole barcode varachittu adiyil ezhuthi
“Scratch gently to read the answer “

Bio practical exam

Tintumon attended bio practical exam.
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Examiner: Tell the bird name by seeing leg.
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Tintumon: I dont know.
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Examiner: u fail.
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Whats ur name ?
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Tintumon: See my leg & tell.

Rocket

Breaking news
Chandranil vellam matramalla thimingalam,kadalaama,sravu thudangiya jeevikalum ullatay kanunnu-NASA
Tintumon: Pavam..NASAKu ariyillallo ROCKET Arabikadalil veena karyam

Rome built

Teacher: ‘When was Rome built?’
Tintumon: ‘At night, sir.’
Teacher: ‘Who told you that?’
Tintumon: ‘You did, sir. You once said that Rome was not built in a day.’
Rome

Tintumon & Kallan

Tintumonte veettil kallan keri.
Ithu kanda Tintumon:
“Ente bagum bookum koodi kondu poda,
illenkil njan ellavareyum vilichunarthum”

Eduthal pongathathu

Cigarette valichukondu pokunna Tintumone kanda palliyilachan: “Eduthaal pongaathathaanalloda ninte chundathu?”
Tintumon: “Eduthaal pongaathathukonda acho.. valichukondu pokunne!!”

I love you

UKG’il padikkunna tintumonodu, LKG’il padikkunna pappymol:”I LOVE YOU DA”
Tintu mon: “Pha dash mole, Mottennu viriyatha ninne kittiyittu njan enthu cheyyana…”?

Interview

Actress: Tamililekkulla ente praveshanam pettennayirunnu.
Tintumon: Athayirikkum vendathra thuni edukkan pattathirunnath alle..!!!

Kaalu potti Hospitalil

Kaalu potti Hospitalil stich idan chenna tintu.Fees Ethrayakum?
Doctr: 1500 rs
Tintu:veruthe 2 stich itta mathi,embroidary work onnum venda.
Fee

Tintumonte guest

Veettil virunnu vanna penkutti kulikkunnath olinju nokkukayayirunna Tintumonod Amma: Enthada ee kanikkunnath
Tintumon: Chee.. mindalle. Aval nammude soap edukkunnundonnu nokkuvaa..
Tintumonoda kali..

aaril anju

MATHS TEACHER: ”Aaril anju poyal enth kittum?”
TINTUMON: “Anjuvinte dead body kittum, karanam avalku swimming ariyilla…!!

Smart answer

Teacher asks !!!
children what do u wish to in future?
Vinod–I want to be doctor,
Deepa–I want to be a good mother.
Tintumon– want to help deepa.

History class

Tintumon history classinu munpu prarthikunnathu kanda teacher
teacher: ithu nalla oru sheelamanu. nee entha prarthiche?
tintumon: ente amma paranjittundu urangunnathinu munpu prarthinkanam ennu.

Poor models

FTV kanukayayirunna achante adukal vanna tintumon FTV noki achanod
” acha avarentha cheriya dress darichirikunnath..?”
Achan: ” avar pavangalayath kondanu..
tintumon: ” ivarekalum pavangal vannal ennod parayanam acha please “

Passive Voice

teacher: Write the passive voice of ” I made a mistake”
tintumon: ” I was made by a mistake”

Convert

Teacher: convert the following sentence to malayalam.
” I SAW A FILM YESTERDAY”
Tintumon: Teacher innale ‘A’ padam kandu.

Complan

Kaattiloode nadannu pokunna Tintumon marathil thoongi kidakkunna paampine kandappol paranjathu enthu??
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“Veruthe thoongi kidakkaathe mummy odu para complan vaangitharaan!” ;)

Tajmahal

Teachr: “Bharya’yude ormakayi shajahan
‘TAJ MAHAL’ panithu”
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Tintum0an: Alla, njan onnu chothichotte ,
iyaal ithra valiya maravikaaran aayirunno ?

Pootum Thakolum

Tintu mon in super market
tintu:Chetta kalikkudukka undo?
sales man:illa
tintu:ice cream undo?
sales man:illa
tintu:chocolate undo?
sales man:illa
tintu:pootum thakolum undo?
sales man:undu
tintu:enna shop pootti veettil poykkude

Cheetha koottukar

Oru divasam achan tintumonodu: “da nee innale kudichu bodham illathe aanu vannathu..enthadaa ithu”..
tintu: ”ellaam cheetha koottukettukal kaaranama achaa..!! aake 5 beer, 5 koottukaar.., athil 4 perum kudikkilla ennu vechaal pinne njan enthu cheyyanaa..!!!. :) “

Tharavattil Pirannavan

tintumon :amme njan enganeya undayathu?
amma:mone nee vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha
tintumon:appol ammayum achanum appooppanum enganeya undayathu?
amma:njangalum vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha
tintumon:appol evide tharavattil piranna otta orennam ellalle

Interview

malayalam pareeksha ezhuthikondirikkunna tintumon
qn: prashastha kavayathri Sugathakumariyumaayulla oru abhimukham ezhuthuka
tintumon inganne ezhuthi…..
Njan: namasth teacher. njan teacherumaayi oru abhimukham nadathaan vanathaanu
Sugathakumari: samayamila mone..poyittu pinne varu.
Njan: shari teacher
kali tintumonnodo???

Maths Proof

Exam Qn:
IF 2(l+b)=P;
Prove that 4b=P.
Tintumon :
2(l+b)=P
2(ell+b)=P
2(bone+b)=P
taking ‘b’ comon
2b(one+1)=P
2b(2)=P
4b=P!
Tintumonoda kali

Best husband

Three Malayali Couples in a Restaurant….
Couple 1 : Husband: “aa sugar ingeduthe Panjare….”
Couple 2 : Husband: “aa liver ingeduthe Karale………”
Upon hearing the above conversation, the third couple started…….
Couple 3: dundu mol : kandille manushya, avarudeyokke sneham. Angane venam bharthakkanmar aayal!
Then,
Couple 3: Tintumon : aa beef ingeduthe Pothe..!!! :) ))

Track suit

Tintumon was chasing a donkey. But he couldnt catch that. After sometime he saw one zebra on the way.
Tintumon caught the zebra and told: “panni track suit ittal njan nine pidikilla ennu karuthiyo?”

Punishment

Tintumon:”Cheyyaatha kaaryathinu enne shikshikkumo teacher?”
Teacher:”Orikkalumilla.”
Tintumon:”Nalla teacher, njan homework cheythittillaa!!”

No freeze liquid

Teacher: ‘Freeze aakatha oru liquid-nte peru parayoo’
Tintumon: ‘Chooduvellam’

Pathra vayna

Pathrathile vartha Tintu mon ingane vayichu: ”Ayyayo K V sebastian Pottitherichu”
Achan: Manda !! nokki vayikku “110 KV substation Pottitherichu enna”

Why boys chase girls ?

Tintumol: Ningal boys enthina girls-ne chase cheyyunnathu. Ningalkkavare Marry cheyyan plan illenkilum.
Tintumon: Pattikal car-inu pirake odunnathu car odikkanano ?

Wrong answer

Wrong answer
Teacher: “If you add 3452 and 3096, then divide the answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get?”
Tintumon: “Wrong answer”

Kalyanam

Mintumol: “I love u”
Tintumon: “I love u too”
Mintumol: “Namukku kalyanam kazhikkam”
Tintumon: “Pakshe aru nammale kalyanam kazhikkum???”

Ambalam

Tintumon: I love u…
girl: kaalil cherippu undu..
Tintu: “Ente hridhayam AMBALAM alla… kayari ponnolu……!!
Tintumon aaaaaaara mon !!